Azimushshaan Shahenshaah 'Kaaju'.....Merhabaa.

Khabardaar, Hoshiyaar...Shahenshaah-e-jannat-e-mithaai 'KAAJU-e-Ilaahi Jalwa-e-afrosh ho rahe hain......

I can apparently see all other sweets and snack items cringe and hide in their miserable, nondescript bowls. After all, the Kaaju Ka samosa has arrived. Its reveling in its stately handsomeness and gloating over its undisputed numero Uno status. It is not a mere part of the snacks table, it adorns it. It obliges it.

My acquaintance with Kaaju ki Barfi goes back to my childhood when one of the students, my father used to teach, had done really well in his exams and brought a Half Kg assorted sweets DIBBA to our home as a token of gratefulness. We being what we were at that time, tore apart the DIBBA to check out the contents. We were amazed by unbelievably thin size of a BARFI-like-sweet. We were delighted to realize that we can actually eat 5 BARFIs together. Not just the innovative size, it had a heavenly taste as well. We became instant fans.

Time passed by. Kaju ki Barfi became more frequent on sweet shops and at our home as well. Years later, I moved to Pune. The name 'Kaju ki Barfi' had changed to 'Kaju Katli'. Taste remained same.

Then came the days then the Cooking BHOOT was into my head and I was even titled 'Halwaai' by my friends. I tried cooking Kaaju Katli once. And I was successful. Believe me, It was no mean effort and no mean result. I liked what I cooked and people loved what I cooked.

Then the craze died. While in Pune, Kaju Katli became a run of the mill item for me. Over the years, fascination reduced itself to indifference. Kaaju Katli had lost its charm.

But now, while I am in Muzaffarnagar for my wedding, right from the day one, I am experiencing Kaaju's supremacy. I feel like Kaaju is really shaking me hard. It wants me to wake up from my indifference and accept its dominance. As I mentioned in my previous blog, I am observing a lot of things these days. This Kaaju is among those things.

I was at my would-be-inlaws place for some reason. Obviously a huge number of snacks, namkeens, sweets etc were brought on the table. It had been a tiring day for me and I was sipping tea in a very relaxed mood. My Bro-in-Law offered me a namkeen. I took some and kept sipping the tea. Suddenly my mother-in-law gets angry over her son. 'ARE BETA YEH KYUN, KAAJU WAALI NAMKEEN DO'. Without a second’s delay, I was offered the Kaju ki namkeen. I smilingly obliged. After a few minutes, the poor guy offered me a really good looking sweet. He was rebuked again. 'BETA KAAJU KI BARFI DO'. By the time I had realized that I am gonna have some good time with Kaaju on this trip. I gently took a piece of Kaaju ki Barfi. As I ate that bite after bite, the smile and satisfaction on the faces around me deepened. They had done their bit. They have nullified all possibilities of me going out of their house and saying that I was not treated well. It was all about Kaaju. On my way home, I was thinking if My mom would ask 'BETA KYA THA NASHTE ME WAHAAN PE'. But she was too busy to ask. But I am sure if she had asked, she would certainly have been satisfied by Kaaju ki namkeen and Kaaju ki barfi. Such is the Charisma of Kaaju.

Since that moment, I have come across countless variants of this sweet. 'Kaaju ke samose', 'Kaaju Kalash', 'Kaaju ki Jalebi', 'Kaaju Rolls', 'Kaaju Tarbooj, 'Kaaju Kesar', 'Kaaju ke laddu'.....let me tell you they all taste precisely the same. Its just the shape, price and name that is difference. But they all have different places in Status hierarchy. But in any case, one thing is damn sure. If somebody has not offered you a Kaaju item in the snacks, he is either not too well off or he is not taking your AVBHAGAT (Hospitality) seriously.

During the wedding-week in north india, a lot of sweets are exchanged between the two families. The funny thing is that at one exchange people are not ready to offer less than 5 Sweet Dibbas. A minimum of 5 kilos of sweets exchange hands at one go. Who eats that and what happens to that sweet is obviously immaterial. Any Logical 'WHY' is instantly rebuffed by a 'TUM NAHI SAMJHOGE BETA, ACHHA NAHI LAGTA'. And if any such exchange remains unaccompanied by the Great Kaaju, it is as good as incomplete and half-hearted.

Such is the power of Kaaju that it can literally categorize our guests. 'KAAJU WALE MEHMAAN' and 'SAADE MEHMAAN'. The first category has further classifications 'KAAJU SAMOSE YA KAAJU KALASH WAALE MEHMAAN' and 'KAAJU KI BARFI BHI CHALEGI' waale mehmaan. And not just the Sweet items, the salted snacks items also have their own pecking order. 'Fried kaaju', 'Roasted Kaaju', 'Masaala Kaaju', 'Kaaju waali namkeen' and the list goes on.

I firmly believe that if some real nerd exercises his grey cells, he can actually calibrate the Guest Importance. Every Guest can be defined by its 'KAAJU QUOTIENT' or 'KAAJU INDEX'

Well Come what may, I am a happy guy these days. Titled as DULHA among my side of people and DAAMADJI among my inlaws, I am enjoying the maximum possible KAAJU QUOTIENT these days. Oh dear God...!! Go easy on my stomach.